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Bless Me Father, For I Have Sinned. Oh Wait… There’s An App For That.

Finally I can celebrate my Catholic faith with the best-ist phone out there; my iPhone.

Yep it’s finally happened. The age old question of ‘is the iPhone is compatible with religion’ has finally been answered with a loud “HELLS YEAH”!

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The White Stripes Officially Call It Quits

The White Stripes have made a not so special announcement yesterday. The duo released a letter for fans on their website, announcing they have officially called it quits.

The White Stripes would like to announce that today, February 2nd, 2011, their band has officially ended and will make no further new recordings or perform live. The reason is not due to artistic differences or lack of wanting to continue, nor any health issues as both Meg and Jack are feeling fine and in good health.

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Natalie Portman’s Awesome Ass. That Is All.

Well not really all. Check out the red band trailer for her movie ‘Your Highness‘. Is it a stoner comedy? Nope.

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Michael Vick Erupts With 6 Touchdowns To Crush The Redskins

Vick looked untouchable wether he was throwing or even running Monday night against the Redskins. The Philadelphia Eagles QB left the game midway through the 4th quarter up 59-21. Vicks stats were listed at, 20/28, 333 yards, 4 TD, 0 INT, 150.7 QB Rating with 8 carries, 80 yards, 2 TD, 0 FUM. Good Lord!

Check out the video here.

Dear Jane: How Do I Have Sex In Public?

Dear Jane,

Recently went on a date with a girl who gets excited by fooling around in public.  Any tips on how to explore this naughtiness without ending up in lock-up for public indecency … or scarring some poor kid for life?

You want to have sex WHERE???  Just kidding!

You can start small, like grope her in public while standing on the grocery line, or waiting for a ticket for the movies.  If you’ve surpassed that, then try fooling around in the movie theater. If you are professionals at that already, then try road head.  It is usually a better idea to try that at night, on a road that isn’t busy.  I have to say, it is much safer to park somewhere secluded and go at it.

Check out the rest of the article here.

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Conan Announced His First Week Of Guests!

You might have read this somewhere else, you also may not have, so here it is either way:

Like most of the world, we’ve been closely following Conan for what feels like forever. Now, with the premiere just under two weeks away, they’ve announced who the new show’s first guests will be, namely…\

Right there is where Flavorwire just LISTED guests from Conan’s first week in office. Us DAPS kids are going to one-up them here because why not? So, now in shnazzy galley form here are Conan’s first guests!

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Do You Care That Kanye West’s Album Art Work Was Banned ?

So yesterday while I was in the middle of watching a House marathon, twitter was buzzing with talk of Kanye West & the banning of his album cover (see above).

I’m all for “pushing the envelope”, But IMO the art is just ugly. I get the artistic value of said cover & what it’s suppose to represent.

(This duality of good and evil, which is needed to balance our world out. Circuming to temptation. The inner monster in all of us… yeah all that dark & gloomy emo shit).

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Napoleon Dynamite Cartoon Series Coming To FOX

According to THR:

Fox is giving a series order to a project based on the indie hit, one of two new teen-friendly animated projects greenlighted by the network. Fox has picked up six episodes of the show, with the original cast on board as voice talent — including Jon Heder as the title character.

This legitimately made me angry when I first heard about it.

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PIPE CITY: Seren Gibson (NSFW)

Oh damn. Seren Gibson is one of the UK’s hottest glamour models. In 2007, Gibson, also known as Haf, was featured on a British reality television series, My Crazy Media Life. The show documented her aspiring modeling career and her family life in Wales. Since then, she has appeared both nude and non-nude for numerous publications like The Daily StarMaximZoo, and Front Magazine. Seren Gibson has that sexy, nasty girl from class look. She’s dirty hot.

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Chromeo Announces Risky Business Tour

Chromeo have announced a full “Risky Business Tour”.  Kicking off in The UK and Australia before heading back in North America rapping things up in mid February. For all the dates check the jump and get tickets quick when Chromeo hits your area. Guests include A-Trak, Theophilus London, Neon Indian, as well as N.E.R.D and more.

Continue reading this post and check out the tour dates here.

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Check This Out: Vans Queen Black Denim Authentic

Vans decided to team up with the band Queen for a low top black denim sneaker. The bands symbol is featured on the tongue, with band posters lining the inside of the shoe, as well as the word “Queen” on the end of the laces. The kicks them selves are made with black denim and the classic vans white bottom sole. You can purchase them now via. Primitive,  for now there are a few more looks at the shoe after the jump.

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Review: ON Natural Oil For Her By Sensuva

ON just hit markets a few weeks ago and I’ve had the privilege to get a sample bottle directly from the awesome J.W at Sensuva who happened to be traveling with the even awesomer G.W fromThe S.T.O.R.E Program.

When I ordered the arousal oil, I immedately read the package.  They boast no parabens, no harsh preservatives, no L-Arginine, no menthols, no perfumes, no added flavors just for flavor’s sake.

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FLAM’s Fashion Fail: Slouch Beanies

Silly hats continue to be popular. From hipster baseball caps to obnoxious fedoras to mohawk caps, people enjoy looking really stupid. That whole “I wear this cause it’s cold out” excuse is kinda bullshit, since people wear slouchy beanies all year round. Again, people get a kick out of looking crazy. Hipster girls are usually the only demographic that can pull this look off….occasionally. I get it, the bohemian look is in. But why cover your beautiful hair, ladies? Especially with such big hats? Bad hair day? Surely not! Let it all out.

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Kanye West announces Album Release date

The “So Appalled” songstress, and creator of G.O.O.D Music has set a release date for his new album. The “fashion guru” of hip-hop’s album is set to release on November 22nd, 2010. This is the date a week before we see Nicki Minaj’s debut album.

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Bro, If Baseballers Keep Losing Their Temper Like This, Then I’ll Start Actually Caring About The National Pastime

Can anyone fill me in on this, I’m pretty much clueless on baseball stuffs.

Seems to me like it was just a pitch that got away and the batter just plain overreacted.

via Deadspin

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I love the people I work with. They write and find the best stuff on the internet. Check out what’s poppin’ this week.

Mega Hype! Yogi Bear On The Big Screen

Oh shit, are y’all excited about the new Yogi Bear movie? The first promotional poster was given the big reveal by Warner Brothers last night. Yes! The demand for this flick has been way high, dawg. Like everybody wanted a Yogi Bear film…espesh in 3D. It’s finally coming out in December! And in the same week TRON: Legacy gets released. Merry Christmas to everybody! I know what I’m seeing that week, motherfuckers. Fuckin’ Tron is for fags.

Dan Akroyd and Justin Timberlake are the big selling points for this. Not gonna lie…I’m def excited about sweet JT as Boo Boo. My fingers are crossed for mad Timberlake bangers on the soundtrack. Also, it looks like Dr. Ray Stantz is following in the footsteps of his old Ghostbuster pal, Bill Murray, by voicing an iconic animal. The Garfield movies were excellent pieces of cinema, so Dannyboy needs to step the fuck up here. Check out the trailer! OMFGahh.

Thanks Flam!!

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Our network is full of really great bloggers and writers. Some of us have great advice or find some really cool stuff on the Internet. Check out some of the great posts that we wrote this week.

FLAM’s Fashion Fail: Flip Flops

Flip flops are usually pretty gross. Wearing them at the beach is A-ok. Putting them on in your own home is totally acceptable. Getting the mail, and walking your dog? Also fine. But hanging out in public with flip flops is a bad look. Why not wear cooler footwear to max out your outfit? It’s so disappointing to see a beautiful girl wear a sexy dress and cheap Old Navy flip flops. People shouldn’t wear them while sporting nice clothes. You ever ask a girl out on a date, and she comes out wearing flops? It’s fucked up!

If you absolutely must wear flip flops cause you’re effin lazy, at least mix them up and wear clean ones. Those nasty once white but now brown/black flimsy sandals are filthy. Show some goddamn respect for yourselves.

Check out the rest of the article here.

Lindsay Lohan Does Complex

Emilio Sparks found the hot pics of  Lindsay Lohan pre-jail time for Complex magazine. Check out the rest of her pics here.

Dear Jane: Will Anal Sex Make Me Crap The Bed?

Is your girl afraid of anal? Read this post with her and maybe she will feel more conftorable about it.

Basics:

Anal sex for the weary is an all day process.  You’ll want to eat right that day so your body easily eliminates (you take a really good poop that day before sex).

Preparation can include:

Shaving your ass if you’re self conscious about hair, and giving yourself a cleansing enema.

When buying an enema you want a simple set up.  Spill out the solution they give you in the bottles, it is better to just use warm water.  You’ll want to rinse your body out a couple of times till you are satisfied with the liquid coming out of your body from the enema.  You could do this all in your shower, but remember that it is all going down the drain pipes – you are better off doing the enema process on the toilet (with a good book while you wait).

Don’t wash out more than 5 times, in my opinion, this starts to agitate your bowels.

You cannot skip this step. Play with a butt plug, or a dildo and a good silicone lubricant.  This will relax your sphincter muscles.  What porno isn’t showing you before those women take it in the ass, is the prep they do before hand with toys.

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MJ Speaks On Miami Heat Trio

Thanks to Kidd Future for finding this!

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